some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
