I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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