we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
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It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize