it was like having sex with a tree stump
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.