Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.

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(631): View more from New York

"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......

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(985): View more from Louisiana

Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write

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(303): View more from Colorado

I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(701): View more from North Dakota

I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"

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(815): View more from Illinois

He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.

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(224): View more from Illinois

I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.

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(519): View more from Ontario

Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.

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