Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.