I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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