I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
A bitchslap is in order.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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