dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
