you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I don't think brook has ever known best
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
