is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
the liver wants what the liver wants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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