the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize