dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
