He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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