doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
