i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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