I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
i will never coherently bang her
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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