I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Randomize
