i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
