$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
