she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize