i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
you would pick up someone in the library
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
