I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize