he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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