So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
found the other keg... it's in the tree
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
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No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
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But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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