I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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