p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize