anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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