Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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