we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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