Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
