My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
