The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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