i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
