it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
