Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
