i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
