Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
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Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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