I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
