I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
