its not stalking. its research.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
