I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
