I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
