i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
