last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
