good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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