o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Randomize
