You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
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