16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
jump out the window naked night went bad
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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