Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
