ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
How external is "for external use only"?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize
