Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
